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Showing posts from January, 2013

Taking Care of Business

I remember when I was little there were times I would taunt those who opposed me. Especially if I was standing in my own front yard. Lol Why? Because I could run into my house if they came after me. If my mom were alerted to what was going on, she would say, "stop that" or "son, don't do that." Reminds me of the old proverb, “When the mice laughs at the cat, there is a hole nearby.” As a Christian it is easy to be full of confidence that the enemy can't harm me. Why? Cause God tells me he has already been defeated. I reminded this morning though that it is not wise for me to taunt my opponent during a battle or after a victory. Have you ever said, "Bring it on Satan!" Yikes! To quote Bob Newhart, "Stop it!" Lol Scriptures remind me that I am in a "wrestling match with principalities, powers and rulers of darkness." Eph 6:12 When I start thinking that I can take of the enemy on in my own strength, and forget that it is Chris

All Bleeders Are Welcome

A life altering event happens. An invasion on your life takes place leaving you wounded and bleeding badly in the middle of the ocean. Where do you go now? You try to swim to the rest of the group and attach yourself to the rescue 'raft' but the group rejects you cause you are bleeding too badly and will attract sharks. The group drifts off to sleep and so you decide to try to swim over to the them again and you find one man still awake. He courageously tends to your bleeding wounds & welcomes you back to the group. This was the picture of one of the survivors stranded at sea after the 1945 Japanese torpedo invasion of the USS Indianapolis Ship. Unfortunately this picture is a familiar picture in many churches today too isn't it? We hear the language, "Keep the bleeders out so they don't affect the rest of the congregation. It's just not safe having them around the rest of us." And yet, thankfully, there are some courageous ones who step out and te

Is There A Front Moving In?

A 'front' by its very definition can "cause the weather to change dramatically because it occurs along the boundary between two air masses with different densities and temperatures." I was thinking about how my past false 'fronts' I put up around people did much of the same in my life. I could be whatever you wanted me to be as long as it made you and others happy. When I would try to be all things to all people, we call this people pleasing, it would cause nothing but storms in my life. In my own mind, I was the one trying to hold everything together to keep the family at peace even though it was never specifically asked of me to do so. Much like thunderstorms in the weather, my unhealthy 'fronts' and broken boundaries were all about making others happy at the expense of myself. This would cause my outlook on life to change dramatically leaving me hopeless and unsatisfied with who I was. I have learned especially thru CR that it is ok that I don&

Hanging Out On "Base"

A couple weeks ago I was playing with one of my friend's son. His son would come and poke me and then run to a table he called "base". Each time he would arrive at this safe place he would yell out "Base!" He knew I couldn't touch him when he was on base. As Christians we have a safe place to run to in times of trouble when we are being chased too, don't we? "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." Psalms 46:1 The issue I am convicted of this morning is that there are times I wait to run to that 'base' only 'after' I am faced with opposition. It is easy for me to view Him as my Savior and Rescuer cause I can speak of many things He has pulled me out of. But, if I only view Him as my Savior and end it there, my reverence for Him will fade. He is also Lord of Lords and King of Kings who desires to have a relationship and interaction with me daily. He wants me to hang out at my resting place, my base,

La, La, La, I Can't Hear You

Have you ever had these thoughts? "I am having trouble feeling anymore" "I have no energy left" "I feel like I am at a stand still and not growing." "I find myself pulling away from healthy relationships" "I seem to be hiding from God" and "It just seems like the pain won't go away" All of these are statements I have made while sitting in my denial. I remember when I was a kid and didn't want to hear or face something, I would put my fingers in my ears and make noises to drown out the truth. "La, la, la, la, I can't hear you...." I wish I could say things changed as I grew into an adult but it was the same picture. I may not have put my fingers in my ears, but my actions showed the same little kid yelling out in my denial to the Father and those close to me, "la, la, la, la, I can't hear you! I don't have a problem!!" I am grateful today that because I have been able to face my den

The Wind Moves The Trees

How was your week? Have you been overwhelmed with that "one thing" that is keeping you up at night or feeling alone in trying to face it? Maybe you are doing what I have from time to time and that is think you are supposed to take care of this problem by yourself and it just isn't working. Very exhausting isn't it? Have you ever been in a forest and just stopped and listened? There is something incredibly powerful in hearing the trees move back and forth. It's almost as if they are dancing in unison as the wind guides them. There is an old proverb that reads: "A tree does not move unless there is wind." Just like those trees in the forest, I realize that I cannot move forward with life without my dependence on the wind in my life. That wind is the Holy Spirit. Sometimes my own need for control in crisis is what quenches the Spirit from guiding me in my life. I am realizing that when I let go of the reigns in my struggles and say, "Lord, even th

This Is My First Time Flying

This past week the National Team for CR spent a good chunk of time planning out the 2013 year. I am so excited!! Do you want to know what we talked about the most? If you guessed the newcomer, you are exactly right! I was traveling home yesterday from the meeting with my wife and one of the flight attendants on the plane was having what seemed to be a bad day. She was barking at people with "turn that phone off" or, "your seat needs to be upright sir", or "put your tray table up sir". Did she forget that these were her customers? She was doing her job, but was she doing it with compassion and grace? This got me to thinking about how I have gotten consumed with small group guidelines and checking off the list of the do's and don'ts. The truth is, just like the flight attendant in her role to keep her area safe, so is it mine as a leader in small groups. However, it hit me that it doesn't mean I shouldn't do it in love and show grace a

Decade of the Newcomer: Looking In The Mirror

Years ago my my music teacher was telling me about an out of state teachers meeting he was late for in attending. He was running up the stairs and saw the group in front of him sitting at the conference table already congregating for the meeting. So he hurriedly ran toward the group not really noticing that there was a man walking toward him as well. But, with his eyes focused on the meetings he was late for, he ignored the man coming toward himself and kept his eyes on the meeting already in progress. And then bam! He ran right into this man, face to face, and exclaimed, "oh, excuse me!" No sooner did he get those words out of his mouth he realized, it was actually a mirror he was looking into and the meeting he was walking toward was actually behind him as opposed to in front of him. Yes, he was face to face with his own reflection, his own face and yes, apologizing to himself. Needless to say, in his embarrassment he turned around and left the meeting immediately. Too fu

What Is The Prize To You?

So what is that 'prize' you are looking for? It's funny how, as we grow, our desires and perception of what is important changes too. It can go from, "I want to be rich, have all the nice clothes, biggest house, have everyone love me, etc" To now, "I am blessed to have a Father who loves me, a home, clothes on my back, a job, incredible real friends, and a family that calls me husband and dad." I love the quote, "Conquer your bad habits or they will conquer you." Rob Gilbert My past hurts did just that. they were conquering my mind and robbing me from seeing His blessing already all around me. I am so glad that the Father has given us Celebrate Recovery to help us deal with our past hurts, hang-ups, that can lead to bad habits? You see, as I began dealing with my junk, my thinking changed and I am much more grateful for what I have today vs. focusing on what I didn't have before. "I press on toward the goal to win the prize for

Keep Breathing, Oxygen Is Flowing

Carol and I were flying to CA yesterday for a CR National planning Retreat. The flight attendant was explaining what to do in case of an accident. In describing the oxygen masks she said, "even though the oxygen is flowing the bag may not inflate." Wow! Isn't that the truth with life? Sometimes we may be going thru life, moving forward & changing and not even realize it. I have to remind myself that just because it doesn't 'feel' like I am breathing and changing, I am with the Fathers help. All I have to do is to keep seeking the Father. Someone once said, “Trying times are not the times to stop trying." I must never forget though, that there is only One that can give me my source of oxygen. We must never give up, even when you may be having a difficult times and the oxygen bag isn't inflating, keep breathing slow and and steady friend. Remember, we breathe today cause The Lord gave it to us. We stand free because of what He did for us. "

I Am No Longer On Lease

Have you ever heard of the term "lease system"? I hadn't until recently. In prison systems there was a program called "lease system" and this is where prisoners were leased out to local businesses to work on bridges, construction, mining etc. They were responsible for feeding them, housing and discipling. This idea of leasing got me to thinking about myself and my own junk. In years past I was stuck in my denial and it did so much to keep me from so many blessings in my life. In essence, by living in denial and acting like the 'stuff' wasn't there, I was allowing this to master my life. I was allowing myself to go into the enemies 'lease system'. This lessor was feeding me and giving me housing alright but man was it the wrong and unhealthy stuff. 2 Peter 2:19 reads, "They promise them freedom, while they themselves are slaves of depravity–for a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him." When I bury my head in the sand and

What Am I Promoting?

In business I have learned that we have to have an objective, a vision & a mission & then a plan to execute it. A marketing team's job is to develop a plan that supports whatever the companies objectives are. I was thinking about this in the context of my life. If my mission is to live a life with truth, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, etc, then my plan has to support that objective. The key I have learned though, is that having the right marketing manager is crucial. I call Him, The Master. There is nothing worse than having the wrong manager leading your mission. There have been times that I had the wrong one leading and it only worked against the objectives and mission in my life. The wrong marketing team promotes wrong thinking, ugly attitude, viewing unhealthy things, abusing my body, speaking lies, selfishness, worry, stress, anxiety, control, despair, negativity, fear, poor habits, over working, low self esteem, poor self image, false advertisemen

Improving My "I" Sight

I can remember being in Colorado on a camping vacation many years ago when the kids were pretty young. We were walking and I saw some Mtn goats on the side of some big rocks on the other side of the river and took a picture. To this day, we still can't distinguish the difference between the goats and rocks in the photo since the colors were causing the goats to be camouflaged amongst the rock. I know they are there but we just can't see them. Have you ever had eye problems? No, not 'eye' but rather 'I' problems? For a chunk of my life I found myself with 'I' problems that left me blind to seeing & experiencing His blessings and direction in my life. I was pretty sure I knew He was there but just couldn't see Him. Why? Cause I was focusing on the wrong thing....myself. Staying in my unresolved dysfunction, kept me selfish and blind to His plan for my life. Someone once said, "I pointed out to you the stars & the moon and all you saw

He Shouts In Our Pain

Many years ago I was asked to sing at a nursing home. Sounds real sweet, but hold off on making that judgement. I brought an old song, newer back then, called "Watch the Lamb". I had a cassette tape track I was using. I had the folks gathered around and they were listening intently and for the most part, enjoying the song. What I didn't realize at the time was that one of the ladies was sleeping as sometimes older people will do at the drop of a hat. :) There is a part of the song that goes from pretty soft, to loud abruptly. Well...when I got to the line that says, "You! Carry the cross....." sung in a very loud and dramatic tone....the lady dosing off about jumped out of her chair and probably very nearly had a heart attack. She probably thought she was dying, bless her heart. Ok, so in hindsight, probably not the best song choice. Lol Have you ever been going through the motions in your life and had kind of grown to become complacent? I was thinking abou

For Me or For Him?

I was watching a little bit of the show Duck Dynasty last night. One of the guys in the show, Willie, was trying to get his air conditioner fixed in the middle of a hot Louisiana. The frustration was that his repair man, known as mountain man, was pretty high maintenance, and was moving very slow in getting this fixed. Then, Willie, in the middle of this frustration says, "believe it or not, Mountain man is the best air conditioning man within 100 miles... He's also the ONLY air conditioning man within 100 miles..." Lol I was thinking about how it is easy in life to develop a mentality that "I am the only one within 100 miles that can do what I can do." Have you ever gotten prideful and thought, "they would be so messed up if I stopped doing _________!" The truth is, most of what I do can be done by anyone. God will get done what He needs done without me. (The exceptions? Husband & dad) Kind of humbling huh? The gift though, is that He choos

Discouragement

Feeling discouraged today? Being the oldest brother of four son's, I had the distinct privilege and honor of being the one to pick on my younger brothers. It used to be my responsibility to wake my brothers up each morning and get them ready for school. I remember one 'evening' setting the clocks up and waking them up to get ready for school. They ate, took a shower, got dressed and waited by the front door for the bus to arrive. Then the final reveal, "guys, it's still night time. Go back to bed." Talk about discouraged....(don't you judge me) lol It's Monday, are you feeling discouraged? For some of us, it doesn't matter what day or time it is, we still feel this discouragement. We don't need a big brother to make us feel this way. Discouragement is so tough sometimes isn't it? It can leave us feeling sad, disheartened and even hopeless at times. I know there have been times where things were not going the way I thought they would. M

Rodney, Your Zipper is Down!

"Something doesn't seem right here...did I forget something?" When I was in High School I will never forget having my big solo during a school choral concert. I had prepared, knew my song, walked out on that stage and sang it with all my might. Meanwhile, my friends were off stage waiting to greet me. Probably to give me some great words of encouragement for the song I just sang, I thought. Instead, as I walked off the stage, I was greeted with, "dude, your zipper is down!" DOH!! Well, at least it was ONLY in front of the ENTIRE school...;) Isn't that just like life. We prepare as best we can, get as much knowledge as we can to succeed, walk out onto the stage of life, and BAM! We realize that we have forgotten to get dressed. I am learning that I have to gird my waist with His truth. This is my foundation to counteract against the lies I hear daily. Put on my breastplate of righteousness. This protects all my vital organs, as soldier in battle, espec

False Talk: The Enemies Telemarketing

Do you ever find yourself talking negative about who you are and what you are capable of doing? I call that false talk. It's those seemingly small things that over time can become so real and seem like truth but in fact, they are just a bunch of lies from the enemy. "I will never amount to anything" "I am not a good leader" "Our marriage will never work" "I am not a good dad or mom" "I am different than anyone else, my issues can't heal" "I can never be a spiritual leader" "My mind is too far gone for change" "I am just too far into my dysfunction, addiction, or brokenness, I just don't see me getting better, changing or healing" I was sharing with a dear friend this past week about how the false talk we speak is so dangerous. I used to be so bad about this and what I found was the negative things I believe and speak can and will become my reality if I am not careful. I am learning tha

The Kitchen Trash Can

It was the fall of 2011; our faithful rectangular hunter green lidless kitchen trash can was beyond retirement. Not only had several places on the lip broken off, cracks were beginning to develop as well compromising the overall sturdiness of the receptacle. It had been a useful and reliant trash can. I bought it over a decade ago and was finally dealing with the fact that I had to let it go. So I mustered up the courage and funds and decided to invest both in a new garbage holder. I really did spend WAY too much time and energy shopping for the item needed. I wanted something without a lid, it had to fit under the kitchen sink and of course I didn’t want to spend too much money on something that no one would see. Time for a perspective check, yes, we’re talking about approximately a $20 expenditure on something that is going to last several years. Doing the math, I think it comes out to LESS than pennies a day. Yet, I still managed to obsess about it. FINALLY, I made a decision. I p

Perfectionism Is A Killer

I was sharing with my wife last night how perfectionism can still rear its ugly head in my life from time to time. Sometimes when I am dealing with people I love in ministry and I want so badly for them to get on a better track, find healing from their hurts & addictions, not get a divorce, restore their family, or whatever it is, I can begin to take it on myself as 'my failure' if they choose not to receive the truth. The reality is all I can do is present the truth and then get out of the way. My value cannot and should not be based on how well they do in their life. In my flesh however, I still sometimes allow that darn perfectionism to kick in and carry the weight of the problem myself. I do believe it must be a healthy burden but am learning 'their' recovery can't become 'my' own recovery. Paul says in Galatians 3:3, "Are you so foolish (Rodney)? Having begun in the Spirit, are you now being made perfect by the flesh?" Ok, ok Paul, I he

"It's Just Rain Buddy!"

I woke up this morning to a pretty good & steady rain. My dog buddy, for whatever reason is afraid of rain. Maybe it's because it's associated with thunder and lightening so often in the past. At any rate, the sound of rain terrifies him. This morning he was at my bedside real early, moaning & whining with his paws up on the bed. He was completely stressed out. My first thought was, "buddy, lay down! It's just rain so quit stressing out boy." Then it hit me. How many times do I allow things that can seem so silly, to stress 'me' out? How many times do I take it on myself? Buddy was doing what was natural to him, he came to his daddy. He was asking me for comfort. I am reminded yet again, that when I feel anxiety for what is seemingly silly, I need to take all of them to the Father. I am so glad the Father's response is not like mine was to Buddy. His first response is NOT, "well Rodney, stop it! It's just rain." I am grateful t

Still Crucifying Yourself?

Ever tried running thru wet mud? I have and no matter how hard I try, I just can't keep a strong momentum. There are times in my life that out of nowhere I hit that mud. Where does some of that mud come from? It can sometimes come from dwelling on my failures from my past or even fears of the future. Someone once said, "Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves--regret for the past and fear of the future." I am learning thru CR that those two things can be linked together. When I dwell on the past, it then becomes my future. If I don't like what happened in the past and crucify myself for past mistakes, then I certainly won't feel real confident about the future. You may be finding yourself losing momentum because you are running thru the mud of your past and fear of the future. "You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You." Isaiah 26:3 The only way I can let go of the past and not make that ugly

The Enemy Doesn't Take Days Off

Last night at halftime of the football game a reporter interviewed the Notre Dame coach asking him, "coach, your team is down by a bunch, what is your strategy coming into the second half?" His response in a joking way, "well, I guess we can hope Alabama doesn't come out in the second half." I was thinking this morning how too often that seems to be our strategy with life. When I make a choice to go out into my day without having put on the full armor of God, I am basically taking the strategy, "well, I guess I can just hope the enemy doesn't come out today." As nice as that would be, the enemy just doesn't take a days off does he? I have to be ready as he is constantly battling. God is more powerful and if I will go into battle with my armor on, then the a father will guide, protect, & steer my mind, body and soul. "My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me." Ps 63:8 Principle 7: "Reserve a daily time with God for

Think Soberly

"Think soberly". As I think about that statement from Paul in Romans 12:3, I am reminded that this is the way I am to evaluate myself. There have been times in my life that I haven't done this with honesty and fairness. Have you ever been told something for so long in your life that it began to become your identity? As a kid, my step father would tell me I was stupid and that I was an idiot. These long periods of lies & negative feedback given to me had a huge effect on my life. I really began believing those things. The result? Low self esteem, a warped view of who I am, not being able to trust others, depression and more. What I have learned especially thru CR is that my value is not based on what others think of me but rather on God's love and purpose for me as His child. My value is on the huge price He paid to redeem me for eternity! I love what Archibald Hart once wrote, "God has each person's life in His hand; He created each person for a pur

Have You Met This Family?

Have you met this family? There is Mr. Jealousy and his sister, Ms. Envy. You may know them as they are the children of Mr and Mrs Anger. This family has many insecurities, and a bad habit of comparing themselves to others in a very unhealthy way. The son, Mr. Jealousy, has a great fear that things close to him will be taken from him at any moment. So he lives in this fear all the time and finds himself very critical of others. His sister, however, obsesses and finds herself full of resentment because in her mind, her neighbors are doing better than she is and she doesn't like it. Have you ever met this family? Maybe you are finding yourself a part of this hurting family right now? I know there have been times in my life where I was very much every one of those people. I was never satisfied with God's provision and in fact I was rebelling against God's will for my life. "If only I had more, what if I lose this, or that...." Talk about a wrong approach for lif

Look up! Look up!

In the film Les Miserable we see a compelling scene, The prison guard, Javert says: "Now bring me prisoner 24601, your time is up and your parole's begun. You know what that means? The prisoner Valjean responds: "yes, it means I'm free." Javert, "No! It means you get your yellow ticket-of-leave; you are a thief" "Look down, look down You'll always be a slave Look down, look down You're standing in your grave" As I was watching this scene unfold I could not help but think about my life. When Christ came into my life, my identity went from a life of being a slave to junk & looking down in shame and pain, to a life of a new identity that didn't just give me a "ticket-of-leave" but a eternal life of true freedom. The enemy will try to lie to me and say I am still that old person, but Christ says otherwise. What a gift we have been given to not just have our salvation but also a new power in Him to face our life'

"You Need To Go Sit On The Pot"

If you have never seen Tim Hawkins comedy acts, you have got to check them out. Great family entertainment that will have you laughing. One that is especially humorous is talking about being little and our mom's unique solution to everything. Kid: "Mom, my leg hurts, my eyes are burning, my back is soar, I have a headache, or mom, my right shoulder hurts" Mom: "You need to go sit on the pot" lol Surely that will take care of all of life's problems, right? In life we can sometimes take this same approach when it comes to dealing with our life's struggles. Sometimes people's quick responses to other's hurting can be, "you need to pray and read your bible more" and then leave them to that alone. Now, while I believe those things are a huge part of the process, that alone doesn't always take care of the emotional scars from our hurts from our past. Sometimes God will remove stuff quickly, but sometimes it takes time. Telling someo

Still Running Into Walls?

Have you ever seen the show 'Dumbest Criminals' on tv? Some pretty humorous stuff on there. The ones I find most interesting is when the criminal tries to put a disguise on that doesn't even come close to really hiding himself. Sometimes a paper bag where the holes aren't cut out properly and he starts running into cabinets & walls. The funny thing is, he is so determined to keep going as he is that he never takes the bag off his head. No matter how many walls he runs into. Ouch! Makes me think about my life and the many masks I attempted to wear to disguise myself and my pain. I was the one looking silly, running into more walls in my life that only brought more pain. I just thank God there is not a video for the world to watch me in those painful denial soaked days. The thing of it is, when we wear those masks, people around us know we are but we convince ourself otherwise. While wearing my mask, I had to finally ask myself the question, "how many walls do

Mental Obsessions=Faith Killers

How many hours was it for you last year? You know, the amount of hours you spent worrying about something that hasn't happened? I know I spent way too much time last year worrying about things that were out of my control. You might be thinking, "don't tell me worry doesn't work, cause 99% of everything I worry about never happens." :) It has been said that worry is not an emotion, but a mental obsession. Oh how many hours I have wasted on my mental obsessions? What does it cause? Lack of sleep, irritability, strain on relationships, & feeling like my life can be out of control which ultimately leads to me being non productive. Worry can be such a time consuming obsession can't it? I am learning that worry is the direct opposite of faith and is fear in disguise. I am learning that while I don't have control over those things, "out of my control", I do have control over allowing myself to be mentally obsessed or not. As I approach this ye