Testimony Sharing Jitters?
Wondering if you
should share your story? Putting it off? Check out this great post testimony “testimony”
of sharing a sharing a story and the gifts that came with it in their life.
On The Other Side
My Post Testimony
Experience
I shared my testimony at Celebrate Recovery on August 8,
2014. I nearly asked to postpone it because I'd been depressed & in a very
bad place for several months leading up to it. I felt like a hypocrite
considering I knew how my testimony ended & that I sure wasn't living those
words at the time. Two wonderful people told me that perhaps it was an attack
from the enemy & that maybe I hadn't fallen off the path, but that God was
taking me deeper. These words spurred me on & once I resolved to follow
through I knew I had made the right decision & actually looked forward to
it.
I was at peace & when friends asked me if I was nervous I
was truthfully able to say, “not really”. None-the-less I used my essential oil
called Peace & Calming just before I went up front!
I delivered my words. I looked up once, but other than that I
looked at the pages. At the end I wanted to look up, but didn't. I wish I had.
As usual all the people stood & applauded & I quickly sat down. The
service ended.
Immediately I was surrounded by a throng (as described by my
son) & even received a bouquet of flowers. I felt like I was in a receiving
line at a wedding! I was surprised at some of the folks that came up to me
afterward, some I hadn't expected to see. Many kind words came to me that
night.
For the next two days I was high on the emotions that
followed. It was as if I had transcended to another plane of spirituality &
was walking on clouds.
I had a sense that when I made my resolution I would somehow
turn a corner in my state of being, it was almost a subliminal awareness. I
walked forward in faith keeping my eyes on the goal....the goal of winning the
attack from the enemy & of completion, having finished what I had been
called to do.
After the two days of “high” passed I knew I was back! I was
my old self again. I had been right & it was wonderful!
People said to me things like:
That was a great testimony
You've really gone through a lot
I bawled
I cried all the way through it
I had no idea
You are so brave, honest, transparent
Some of them more than once. Even in the weeks that followed
I still had people coming up & speaking to me. One woman hugged me without
saying a word. Another woman came to me after & said it was her first time
at CR & how much she appreciated my testimony, she could relate & was
moved by what she heard. I was actually surprised at how many people said they
cried. Their words were like balm to me.
Before sharing my testimony I knew I wanted to be better,
whatever that meant, & that I had things to say. I wanted to please God
& I wanted to follow the program, but I sure wasn't prepared for the
reactions I got.
Another amazing thing that I've experienced since sharing is
that I'm able to see my own life with a new perspective. I've likened it to
standing on a precipice while looking out over some vast vista...seeing my life
stretched out before me it was obvious where the Lord had spared me, protected
me, divinely intervened...I'm not sure I'd seen my life like this until then.
Of course I knew what I'd been thru & I believed God had done certain
things on my behalf, but this was something else.
It was like a thread had woven together all the pieces of my
life, I could clearly see the whole
picture. God's hand in everything I'd ever been through & ultimately how
much He cared for me.
So...I'm still walking high & the other day I read, “I waited
patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me & heard my cry. He drew me up
from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, & set my feet upon a
rock; making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth. A song of praise
to our God. Many will see & fear, & put their trust in the Lord. Psalm 40: 1-3.
I've read the Psalms before, but this time those particular
verses leaped out at me. They meant something real! It had become experiential.
The design of CR was in those verses & because I had obeyed others would be
blessed. Just by little ole me & my sad little story.....that ends in
victory.
So the two things I know now on this side of my testimony are
1) I see how consistently God has protected me & provided for me & 2) I
have been used as a small cog in the grand cogwheel of God's plan. How
wonderful is that!!
I can only continue to give God the glory & praises from
my heart. He is beyond good & I love him all the more.
Time to share your story?
Rodney Holmstrom
Go to www.celebraterecovery.com for more information on a group near you.
Thank you for posting this! I will be sharing my testimony for the first time on the 10th of October. This was so encouraging!
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